Thursday, May 19, 2011

..oops..


Do you think it's broken??

Friday, May 13, 2011

hard things

how is it possible for you to not like someone anymore, but still care so much about them?
to the point that they still occupy your thoughts, and dare I say it, your emotions?
how do they have control over you? about the way you feel about yourself? And why do you care about how they care about you?

....life....

I can easily say that the past 7 months of my life have been the most emotionally challenging and spiritually draining months of my life. I'm not sure how I've even been able to hold it together as much as I have. I feel very fragile and weak, not knowing how to hold on any tighter than I have been trying to do. I don't understand myself anymore and it's hard to admit that weakness.

All things happen for a reason, right?
until then, I can only hope.

Tuesday, May 3, 2011

It seems the older you get, the faster time goes.
Is that true for anyone else?

I can't believe I am finishing up my Junior year of college. In some ways I feel like I just graduated high school, and in other ways, it feels such a long time ago. It's interesting how much has changed over the past few years and especially over this past year.

I came into my junior year having very distinct and, what I thought, cemented plans I wanted to do. The Lord clearly had a different plan for me and made it very well known from the beginning of fall semester.

I am grateful for The Lord and his way of teaching us. The majority of the time it isn't how we want to be taught, but I've learned that He truly does know best.

I don't believe in coincidences. Not at all. I know that The Lord has His hand in each and every one of our lives every day. It may just take us a little longer to recognize and appreciate Him. Over these past two semesters He has made His plan more evident to me as I have turned to Him for comfort and healing.

This year has been incredibly challenging for me and I'm surprised I am still in once piece, even though I don't feel it at times. I know that through The Atonement of our Savior, I literally have been mended and molded into something better than I was before. I know promises will be fulfilled if I remain faithful and trust in Him.
Don't just believe Christ, believe in Him.
He will heal you.

Things I have learned this year:
-almost nothing goes as planned
-you do not know best, He does
-patience is a hard thing to develop, but I'm still striving
-people have their agency and you must accept that fact
-just because one thing doesn't work out, doesn't mean it never will
-The Lord will always provide another way to fulfill His promises
-He has all power
-daily scripture study is enjoyable and does ease your mind from worldly things
-even though you are older, it's still acceptable to act like a child sometimes
-school really isn't that bad
-The Atonement cures all pains and disappointments. It makes unfair things fair if you allow it