just let it happen.

If I've learned one thing this school year it is simply that sometimes you just have to let it happen. Let things happen. Let disappointment happen. Let crying happen. Let people in happen. Don't make plans for once and just see what happens. Take chances. Be brave. Don't be afraid to have an emotional break down when you're making hard decisions.

Yesterday was one of those just let it happen days. But more on the whole breakdown end. I only cried, verbally told myself to pull it together--which made me cry more. I felt I had lost it. But you know what? I feel so much better now

. I had a grand ol' time with my good friend Madeline as we drove down Sardine Canyon headed to our home towns. We talked. I talked. She listened, reassured me that I'm alright and then we were on our way into other conversations. It was good just to talk. Release all my emotions and have it float away in the air. Thank goodness for wonderful friends.

Moral of the story, Just let it happen. Let yourself feel. Don't try to appear to be strong when you want to just curl up and cry. Just let it happen, get up, and start over.

Here's for starting over.

p.s. I will be sporting my first pair of sperry's probably for the next 78 days.

birthday girl

this is a shout out to, sincerely, one of the best people I know.

THE Madeline Newhouse.
She is wonderful
kind
honest
hysterical
fashionable
loyal
loving
understanding
goofy

But honestly, I know that I can look to this girl for anything. Good night drives where I tell her stories about how a man thought I was moving into his apartment, I trust and value her opinion more than anyone and I know that she'll be honest about it with me. She tells me, kindly, when I'm being stupid or thinking too much. She doesn't force me to tell her things, she's kindly patient and lets me realize that I do need advice and help. Madeline is the kind of person that everyone looks to for advice and a good friend.

We first met at EFY and shared half of a Jimmy Johns sandwich--I was even sick, but she still shared with me. We went to Disneyland, and became even better friends. Came back up to Logan and have been inseparable since. I love her. A lot!


Please enjoy this video from Cheeseburger in Paradise in Hawaii

Paradise

Does anyone even read this blog still?

Probably not. I have been neglecting it. But this is a post worth reading.

So remember how I told you I was going to Hawaii? Well, what seemed to be a dream came true. At least I think. Sometimes I still have a hard time believing I was there, and that this incredible place is even real. So many great things happened on this trip and I had all intentions to do a video blog every day while being there. But with lack of internet, it was a little impossible.

Uluani's Shaved ice. Let's just say this was not our only visit there.

The rainbows in Hawaii are seriously ridiculous! We at least one a day!

Jaron, Madeline, and I watching the sunset right in the middle of nudy beach and big beach.

Big beach. When you type in Maui in google, this is the beach that comes up the most. It was breathtaking!

Snorkeling. It grows on you.

Yes, Jaron is the most tan but whatever.

We're the best of friends. Having so much fun together.

I'm just awkward.

Day #1 at the beach with many many more to follow.

Don't worry. There is much much more to say about this trip. The hook ups, the inside jokes, the breaching whales, etc. So stay tuned. It's quite the time.

I had so much fun that I may or may not have already looked up flights back.

but next stop: Cabo.

current feeling

This is how I feel right now:

13 days people. 13 days.